Review: "President Wolfman"

There will always be a part of me that will love "Kung Pow: Enter the Fist". Don't look at my review like that... When I was in grade school, I would take the newspaper cartoons, cut out different characters and lines of dialogue and rearrange them to create a new strip that I called The Funnies. A boy can do wonders with a pair of scissors and a stick of glue.

And people can do similar feats with a foreign film and some editing software. "Kung Pow" was basically the movie version of The Funnies; you take old footage, shoot some new footage, do some voice overs and you've created a whole new flick! The final product hasn't exactly aged well, but I still appreciate its remix / re imagining attitude (and so did my cousins when I showed it to them).

It's that very attitude that makes me love this digital renaissance so much.

"President Wolfman" is not on the juvenile level of humor that "Kung Pow" lived on, but it does share a similar spirit. You see, the filmmakers took footage from public domain films - the majority of which coming from "Werewolf of Washington" - hired some voice actors, wrote a new script and put together what I can only best describe as a joyous romp. This new story follows President of the United States John Wolfman, as he deals with a popular piece of legislation that would sell America to China (marketed to the country as Chi-merica) in an effort to erase our debt. Oh, and he's also a werewolf.

Political satire can be hard to do without hitting the audience over the head with some kind of message, but "President Wolfman" is only interested in making you laugh at how ridiculous it all is. I once did a speech for public speaking class where I announced my candidacy for President. I laid out a goal, where not only would I stop the War in Iraq, but I would make it up to the country by offering a product placement with Pepsi; change the name of their capital to that of a soda, and you've got reparations. Of course, I was just being cheeky, but it also made a good point about where we were at as a country at the time - our ignorance towards a region of the world we didn't understand.

We see Chinese officials as classic racial stereotypes, tv commercials used as propaganda against its own people (us) and a congress that just likes to party. Sure, it's somewhat cartoonish in its presentation, but it really does nail certain things on the head; our national mindset towards other countries and races is still pretty tasteless, our government and media have no problem manipulating the voters into agreeing with anything they want and the only way a President can accomplish something is by morphing into a beast. This is my kind of political / social commentary. Through silliness, there is truth.


PW LocalScreen promo from Mike Davis on Vimeo.

The movie is also very aware at what it's doing. At one point, a sequence involving an emergency pregnancy is shown. This piece of footage has been circulated all over the internet, and really doesn't forward the story in any way. It's clearly meant to take the audience out of the film for a moment, and realize how much fun the filmmakers are having. One of the most obvious wink winks I've ever seen, in one of the most enjoyable projects I've seen in years.

I almost want to dust off my copy of "Kung Pow: Enter the Fist". Almost. Maybe I'll give "What's Up, Tiger Lily?" a view. Or maybe I should grab a newspaper (while I still can) and cut and paste away. Ought to be fun, no matter what I choose...

3/5 *'s

He Said, I Said Review: "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter"

Part of my blog's new design and new domain name is also a new commitment to posting more content on a weekly, then perhaps daily, basis. To do this, I have to come up with new things to write about, and in interesting ways.

In June, I finally got to meet the Times Picayune film critic Mike Scott during the recording of the first #TeamNOLAFilm podcast. He's a real cool guy, with his own take on movies. A few weeks ago, he posted a fairly negative review of "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter" - a movie which I actually kinda enjoyed.

The following review will be the first in a series called 'He Said, I Said', where I take quotes from another criticism, and offer a counter (or similar) opinion. Yes, this does mean that I will be somewhat defending a story about an axe wielding, vampire killing American President. Enjoy:

This is a movie that re-imagines our 16th president as a secret, ax-wielding slayer of bloodsuckers. It isn't meant to be a documentary. It's not intended to be scholarly... Rather, it's meant to be bloody, butt-kicking fun, as the Great Emancipator becomes the Great Decapitator.

I couldn't agree more. AL:VH is supposed to be historical revisionism at its most fun. And, with a title so ridiculous, it HAS to deliver on what it advertises. Much like "Snakes on a Plane" before it, this film is, indeed, about what its title says - Abraham Lincoln killing vampires. Nuff said.

But here's the thing about movies rooted in such a fantastical premise as this one: While it's OK for a filmmaker to ask that we suspend our disbelief, that filmmaker has to help us do it. In "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter," Bekmambetov doesn't come even close to keeping up his end of the bargain.

 Could you give an example?

In a later scene, a particularly nasty vampire -- being pursued by Walker's Lincoln, who has been hell-bent on ridding the world of bloodsuckers since his mother was killed by one when he was but a boy -- throws a horse at the future president. Lincoln catches it. And then rides it.

Thanks. Well, yes, that sequence was pretty hard to swallow. To be fair, the color, lighting and cg made it hard to tell what was going on in the first place... Lincoln showing agile super powers outside of swinging an axe was definitely a misstep, but not that big of one. In the grand scheme of this movie, it was more of a nitpicky oversight; like the use of parsecs in "Star Wars: A New Hope" (though, AL:VH is no SW). My disbelief - and keep in mind that I too can be easily annoyed - was suspended from the opening titles. All notions of reality were thrown out a moving car.

That said (or written), there are some problems with the film, like the pace. Abe learns to kill with an axe in ONE SCENE! He swings, hits a tree a few times, and is able to destroy it moments later. In "Kill Bill Volume 2", when The Bride is training to punch a hole through a block of wood. We see her struggling to accomplish this over an extended montage, before finally doing it in the present time. Lincoln gets maybe a minute before he heads out for the hunt. Let us see his training! Let us get to know him better! We go from angry young man to idealist to President in no time.

Another casualty, and an unforgivable one, is the central metaphor from the Seth Grahame-Smith book on which it's based, in which Lincoln's fight against the parasitism of vampires is equated with his fight against the parasitism of slavery...

...those who had read the book knew that - aside from the whole vampire-hunting thing - it was a surprisingly well-researched Lincoln biography. You could revel in the guilty-pleasure aspect of it, but you could also learn a thing or two about our 16th president. That added a satisfying weight to Grahame-Smith's yarn. For Bekmambetov -- who co-wrote the screenplay with Grahame-Smith -- all that goes out the window.

This is the second main problem. We do get historical figures in cameo wink wink appearances, and, with the revisionist tone, major events in Lincolns life are closely tied to vampires (like the death of his son). But, for me at least, a certain amount of weight was missing. For example, the civil war battles. We see Union soldiers violently stabbing Confederates and vampires (one even gets a knife crowned on the top of his head) with Lincoln giving a speech in a voice over. This made me chuckle, when it shouldn't have. The schlocky nature of the story suddenly turned against itself.

Ridiculous is OK -- but this is beyond ridiculous. Rather, it is a schlocky, poorly made, B-movie mess.

Beyond ridiculous is just as good, if not better at times. Problems acknowledged, this still works as a fun goof of a film. Just be sure you at least use wikipedia in your essay on the Civil War.

3/5 *'s

Feel free to offer suggestions and comments regarding this new series.